'Cats' out of the bag, let's put them back in — movie review

A tribe of cats gathers to decide who among them deserves to ascend to the Heaviside Layer and come back to a new life in this adaptation of Andrew Lloyd Webber’s musical

Quick review: At best, Cats is an interesting exercise in the boundaries of filmmaking. At the worst, which it treads closer to, it’s a disturbing, confusing, and misguided acid trip of a musical.

It’s truly confounding that a major Hollywood studio financed a movie adaptation of the stage musical Cats. Yes, it’s considered a classic. However, it received mixed reviews at best and since then its legacy has been questionable at best. I mean, other than “Memory” can you name another song? But what makes it truly baffling is that there’s not an obvious way to adapt it other than putting people in catsuits. But where there’s a will, there’s a way, I guess?

I’ll cut to the chase. Cats is more horrifying than you’d ever imagined. The highly publicized and poured over trailer doesn’t even do justice to just how off-putting the CGI — digital fur technology if you will — is to watch. It’s truly in the deepest trench of the uncanny valley. The biggest issue is that the very realistic fur clashes with the humanoid bodies, movements, and faces of the cast of cats. In some places, it works. Mr. Mistoffelees (Laurie Davidson giving one of the best performances in the film), the magic cat, comes off a little better as the cat features obscure his face at least a little. It can’t be said for the rest.

The reason I want to start my review here is that it overshadows anything good that you could derive from the movie. The musical numbers are audaciously staged and fascinating to watch. The visuals are like a trip on acid. And the cast, for all the wonkiness with the conceptualization of the cats, are going for it in every scene. However, it’s almost impossible to get past just how ridiculous everyone looks. Frankly, it’s distracting.

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It also doesn’t help that the movie doesn’t really have a plot — though, that’s carried over from the musical. Over the course of the film, we’re introduced to various cats through elaborate musical numbers that we through the eyes of Victoria (Francesca Hayward), a recently abandoned cat. We meet Munkustrap (Robbie Fairchild), the leader of the tribe, who explains that every year they gather for the Jellicle Ball where Old Deuteronomy (a wild-looking Judi Dench) chooses one cat to ascend to the Heaviside Layer.

Over the course of the night, we meet the overweight cat Bustopher Jones (James Corden), showcat Rum Tum Tugger (Jason Derulo), lazy housecat Jennyanydots (Rebel Wilson), Gus the Theatre Cat (Ian McKellan), and Grizabella (Jennifer Hudson), an old and mangy cat that was once known to be the most glamorous.

In the wings is Macavity (Idris Elba), a cat with mystical powers who is so bent on being the Jellicle choice that he’s systematically taking out his competition with the help of Bombalurina (Taylor Swift) — who performs the entertaining and truly mind-boggling number “Macavity: The Mystery Cat,” which finds her drugging the other cats with catnip. You can’t make this stuff up.

Drawing inspiration from musicals is a good trend, in my opinion. Creating a successful movie musical is difficult but having strong source material is a start. The fact of the matter is that Cats doesn’t have good source material to begin with.

All this being said, the whole movie is incredibly brave. I can say without a doubt that I have never seen anything quite like it. It’s overwhelming, confusing, and inarguably bad. But was I entertained? I sure was. I could not take my eyes off the screen. I’m going to take everyone I know to see it just so we can talk about which cat should be the Jellicle cat. I’m obsessed with the fact that it exists. A cult classic in the making.