Velvet Buzzsaw doesn't become the movie we want it to be until the last 30 minutes. That's when it starts working effectively as an art-world satire and horror-thriller. The rest, though, has a hard time striking a balance between too. So much so that it strikes exactly the wrong balance.
However, there are interesting elements. The film reunites director and writer Dan Gilroy with Jake Gyllenhaal who plays Morf, a highly respected Los Angeles art critic, and Rene Russo as no-nonsense gallery owner Rhodora, both of whom he worked with in his film debut Nightcrawler.
With Velvet Buzzsaw, he trades the dark and shadowy crime underbelly of Los Angeles with the colorful and chic world of the art community. Everything is brightly lit, incredibly crisp, and fully saturated. And that's a problem. Not only does it not create the tense atmosphere the movie sorely lacks, but it's also a poorly shot movie. The cinematography is reminiscent of a CW primetime soap.
What keeps it at least somewhat afloat is the intriguing plot. After discovering her neighbor dead in the hallway of her apartment building, art agent Josephina (Zawe Ashton) ventures into his apartment to find hundreds of pieces of artwork — some haunting and some disturbing. She takes them to Morf who confirms that they are all masterworks and should be worth millions.
It's discovered that the artist was a man with a troubled past named Vetril Dease. Catching wind of the incredible portfolio, Rhodora convinces Josephina to let her sell the pieces in her gallery where they quickly become a popular fixture and sweep through the LA art scene.
However, these aren't just paintings. They're cursed. Anyone that profited from them is dying in increasingly horrific ways. No one seems safe. There's gallery worker Bryson (Billy Magnussen of Game Night fame), another art gallery owner Jon Dondon (Tom Sturridge), Morf's art curator assistant Gretchen (Toni Collette coming off Hereditary), and Rhodora's latest client Damrish (Daveed Diggs) who are all at risk.
All the while, Gilroy attempts a cutting satire of the often pretentious and self-involved community of high-end art. While it gets some good digs in that remind us just how silly art can be — there are incredible one-liners like “a bad review is better than sinking into the great glut of anonymity” and “critique is so limiting and emotionally draining” — it doesn't really poke at anything we didn't already know.
On the horror side of things, Gilroy fails to create much suspense or scares. The death scenes are interesting and reminiscent of the Final Destination series, but none are surprising or shocking. A large part of that is because the plot never truly gets off the ground. Morf spends some time investigating the mysterious artist Dease to try and unravel the mystery of the paintings, but it's a subplot when it should truly be the main plot. Instead, we spend time on the relationship between the bisexual Morf and Josephina and intrigue around the ownership of the paintings.
That leads to the biggest problem Velvet Buzzsawhas. It's filled with cold and pretentious LA art people that are hard to care about, including Gyllenhaal's Morf who comes the closest to being a protagonist. Without an audience surrogate or relatable character at the center, it's hard to even care about what's happening the characters. There's an attempt to make young assistant Coco (Natalia Dyer) that character, but she ends up not being used that way.
It's frustrating considering the caliber of the actors in the cast and the intriguing premise. That being said, Gilroy mines enough ridiculous observations and stray one-liners about the LA art world that make it an entertaining enough watch. However, I think it had the potential to be great. With a name like Velvet Buzzsaw, I wasn't expecting anything less.
Where to stream Velvet Buzzsaw: Available to stream on Netflix.
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